We'd really appreciate some candy, please.

It's teacher appreciation week.  Well, Spring teacher appreciation week, because we appreciate our teachers in the fall, too.  And on their birthdays, at Christmas and at the end of the year.  It's gets a little spendy, actually, but whatever.

This week the schedule dictated by that voice on high, The Room Mom Coordinator, is this:

Monday: Bring your teacher her favorite candy or cookies.
Tuesday:  Write a card telling your teacher what she means to you
Wednesday: Bring your teacher a flower (we've helpfully arranged for the local Publix to have extra flowers in stock this day!)
Thursday: Have your parents write your teacher a thank you card.
Friday: Bring your teacher some lifesavers to say "You've been a lifesaver to our children."  (Publix will stock up on these, too!)

I appreciate my kids' teachers a lot.  Anyone who would willingly lock themselves in a room all day with Sam and 17 other first graders just like him has my utmost respect because that is not a job I could do.  In this way I am grateful for teachers the same way I am grateful for police officers and firemen and the military. They do a difficult job that not everyone is cut out for.  I need them on that wall.

I balk a little at being told how and when to do my appreciating, but I go along with it because I don't want my kid to be embarrassed because he's the only one who didn't bring chocolate on Monday. So the chocolate and lifesavers I bought this weekend (not at Publix out of sheer spite!) have been sitting on the kitchen counter and the kids have been eyeing them greedily and asking frequently and to  no avail if they can have some.

Yesterday after school Jack said, "Mrs. S. said that you aren't required to participate in this week's activities."

"Yeah!" said Sam, "Mrs. G. said so too.  We don't have to do teacher appreciation if we don't want to."

This is considerate of the teachers, I think, to keep any kids who didn't buy flowers at Publix from feeling bad. Also, probably there was some backlash after such a big deal was made over "All About Dads" week that quite a few kids cried bitterly when their Dads could not be at school. Our school has a slight tendency to go overboard.

"We don't want to participate."

"You don't?"

"Nope." 

There is a short pause and then, "Now can we have those lifesavers on the counter?"

Comments

[llemma]

I can tell you, here's what I actually want from parents to make me feel appreciated:

1. Make an effort to understand what our program is about. Have some context for the stories your kid brings home, and if something doesn't sound right, at least take the trouble to find out whether it's a misunderstanding, a mistake, or something we're doing on purpose, so you can be an informed complainer.

2. Notice when I go out of my way for your kid. If I call you to remind you that your kid owes an assignment, the correct response is "thank you so much," not "why didn't you tell me this earlier" or "why are youall so hard on them."

3. Remember that I'm committed to your kid, but I have 74 other students too. I can't accommodate your child's needs in a way that interferes with everybody else's learning, and I can't really make time to give you a call once a week with an update or to remember your special afterschool schedule. If you want extra attention, the initiative's going to have to come from you.

4. Raise a polite kid who can see #1-3 himself and says thank you every once in a while.